Weekly from – 10 am – 2pm
A loving invitation from Karin Mayer
Now that we are OPEN AGAIN, we have more fun opportunities for YOU to help out. We need greeters and microphone tenders, and Zoom tenders and copy makers and kitchen organizers and of course we need YOU and your FRIENDS!
High Desert Welcome Group
Our group is based on positive thinking and positive living. We welcome anyone from the community who would enjoy a mid-week boost of positivity. We meet in the social hall of the Yucca Valley Center for Spiritual Living every Thursday morning between 10:00 AM and 11:30 AM. Our program is an engaging mix of presentations on varying topics with group discussion and live music lead by singer, songwriter, Paul Gerkin. Those who choose to, get together for lunch after. Always good times!
THIS THING CALLED LIFE
“Labels Are For Clothing
By Merryl Lentz
Sometimes, when we assume certain roles in life, it influences our mindset, affects the way we interact with others, and impacts how we envision or even expect them to act in return. These self-appointed labels can make us think of ourselves as a one-dimensional summary of who we are: The Helper, The Consoler, The Fixer, The Peacekeeper. These roles may become our identity, without any room for other traits to shine through.
Titles and roles are tricky because we may feel uncomfortable when we’re forced to act outside of these narrow, rigid parameters. It’s a step into uncharted territory, and we may become baffled about how to navigate these uncharted waters. Or to quote Wayne Dyer, “Examine the labels you apply to yourself. Every label is a limit you will not let yourself cross.”
If, for example, we’re a good friend, we may feel dutybound to be responsible, supportive and self-sacrificing. We may never have said the word “no.” Doing this may be fine for a while. We believe that our assistance and loyalty is crucial to them.
However, when we become the self-appointed overseer, it may lead us to do too much for others out of habit, guilt, or an automatic default response. You’ve probably experienced someone constantly saying, “Let me, I’ll do it, I’ll sort it out for you.” Maybe you’ve done so yourself.
It may have been tempting to sit back and give them the green light. It may have been a relief to be freed from having to think about an issue or make a decision. Or to think for yourself! That person bears the label of The Martyr. Or maybe The Good Friend. Maybe The I-Want-You-To-Like-Me or The Human ATM.
Eventually, that person may be taken for granted: We may come to expect them to deal with the matter. After all, they always do.
And then things start falling apart.
As we become the regular support provider and our efforts are increasingly expected and taken for granted, we may begin to simmer with disgruntlement about the absence of recognition and appreciation. After all, don’t we at least deserve a “thank you” for being so thoughtful, so caring, so involved?
Sometimes we need to take a step back and reflect upon our actions. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “We teach people how to treat us.” This doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, but that you might consider examining what you’re doing that teaches others to mistreat you. How did you teach them that it’s acceptable?
You need to re-educate them that you can’t be summoned at the last minute, or be expected to cancel plans to accommodate them, or that you aren’t a limitless wellspring of time, attention or money.
Then you can learn to counter these presumptions with something less draining and grudge-provoking, and more mutually beneficial and respectful.
“When you say ‘yes’ to others
make sure you are not saying “no” to yourself.”
~ Quote by author Paolo Coelho
This week’s Wisdom is from:
THE SCIENCE OF MIND
“All Nature waits on man’s recognition of
and cooperation with Her laws,
and is always ready to obey his will;
but man must use Nature’s forces
in accordance with Her laws
and in cooperation with Her purpose –
which is goodness, truth and beauty –
if he wishes to attain self-mastery.”
“How to Use the Science of Mind”
“When we realize that the Law of Mind in action is a mechanical force, all sense of compulsion or trying to make things happen will disappear from our consciousness. We shall proceed on the assumption that thoughts and things are identical. Our time will be spent more in acquiring a consciousness than in trying to make things happen.”